Chocolate Cake, Having Pride, and Finding ALL of You - Dissociative Identity Disorder
Chocolate Cake Recipe:
Cake:
3c Flour
2c Sugar
1 ½ Sticks Butter (or vegan butter - melted)
3/4 c Oil (Olive Oil or Grapeseed)
1 ½ c Water
8 Tablespoons Cocoa Powder
¾ c Buttermilk (or Soy/Almond/Oat Milk with 1 Teaspoon of Apple Cider Vinegar/Lemon Juice)
1 ½ Teaspoons Baking Soda
2 Teaspoons Cinnamon (optional)
1 Teaspoon Espresso (optional)
2 Teaspoons Salt
3 Eggs (or 3 Egg Replacers – 3 Tablespoons Flax Seed to 9 Tablespoons Water)
Buttercream:
4 Sticks of Butter (softened)
2lbs of Powdered Sugar
1 Teaspoon Vanilla
1 Teaspoon Salt
6 Tablespoons Cocoa Powder
For the Cake:
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit (or 160 Celsius)
2. In a small pot, combine the water, butter, oil, and cocoa powder. Heat over a medium heat until combined and cocoa powder darkens and the mixture is smooth.
3. In a separate bowl combine flour, baking soda, cinnamon, espresso, and salt. Whisk to combine, and add buttermilk. Slowly stream in the cocoa powder mixture and whisk until it’s all combined and smooth. Add the eggs one at a time until combined.
4. Spray two 9’ pans or a single half-sheet baking tray with oil and divide the batter into the pans.
5. Bake for 10 minutes, and rotate.
6. Bake another 10 minutes and rotate.
7. Check with a toothpick until it comes out clean – every 5 minutes.
8. Remove from oven and let it cool
9. Meanwhile, make the buttercream (i.e. the best buttercream ever)
For the Buttercream:
1. Make sure your butter is softened, and cream it together with all the other ingredients in a bowl with a hand mixer or in the bowl of a stand mixer with the paddle attachment.
2. If it’s too stiff due to the cocoa powder, add 1 Tablespoon of water or milk of your choice.
Ice the cake!
1. After the cake has cooled, remove it from the pans and spread an even layer on the top of one of the cakes.
2. Place the other cake on top and ensure they’re aligned.
3. Ice the sides and tops as you desire – use piping bags, a spoon, a knife a bench scraper – the options are endless. It doesn’t have to look beautiful to taste delicious. And it’ll taste THAT much better because you made it. Have pride in your creations!
“The truest act of rebellion is to take pride in your identity without needing permission.”
-Ren Newman, 2020
I’m sure the majority of those out there who’ve seen Shrek know the infamous line “Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.” And Donkey’s retort is that it’s similar to cake - a much better analogy. Like some nuggets of wisdom from that godforsaken movie, it’s true. People are akin to cake and have plenty of layers. Some are crumbly and unstable on their own and need cake stands or support for the weight of the icing on top of them; they come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and are decorated differently depending upon where you’re at. People are the exact same. The more you delve into who you are, the more layers you discover - whether through therapy, trauma, or positive experiences, who you are is stored and formed in layers of your life. That’s why I wanted to discuss dissociative identity disorder this week.
It is characterized by an involuntary escape from reality characterized by a disconnection between thoughts, identity, consciousness and memory. People from all ages, groups, racial, ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds can experience a dissociative disorder. Depersonalization and derealization can manifest as well, and can be really unsettling for those who experience this. It doesn’t detract from their value as a person nor does it negate anything about their personalities. I discuss more in the podcast below, but will leave you with some links to other sources to learn more.
Resources:
https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Mental-Health-Conditions/Dissociative-Disorders
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2719457/
https://www.sane.org/information-stories/facts-and-guides/dissociative-identity-disorder
Videos on DID:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0kLjsY4JlU&ab_channel=MedCircle
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ek7JK6pattE&ab_channel=AnthonyPadilla
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC6kFD5xIFvWyLlytv5pTR1w/videos
Baking-ish is a podcast produced and edited by Fahrenheit Co., a U.S. based entity run and organized by Ren Newman.
**I am not a mental health professional. Please talk to a healthcare professional before doing or changing anything within your daily life. These experiences and opinions reflect only my personal experiences.
